Through every crisis there is a chance to be reborn.

A few posts ago I wrote of a deep feeling that something was about to happen, the mystery was just what that something was though.  As it turns out, my spirit guides were warning me of the calamity that was circling.  It has struck but I remain unsure of the reasons why.  However, I have always believed that when the universe unveils something terrible, there must be a counter balance of good yet to occur.  The balance will be maintained, it is just a matter of time.  Till then I will sift through the remains of this acrid experience and carry on with a belief in restoration.

"Through every crisis there is a chance to be reborn" 

10,000 visits!

After almost 5 years the number of visitors to these pages has topped the 10,000 mark.  I would never have imagined that it would be so.  What started out as an online journal for myself has evolved.  It became a way to stay in contact with family and friends about my 'year' in New Zealand.  Then I began adding in brief light hearted entries interspersed with lengthy philosophical revelations. It has served me well as a point of record and as an outlet of expression.  It started out as a resource for myself and continues to do so.  I love reading what it was like in the beginning, about things that have happened over the past 5 years.  Little things that I had forgotten or about having thoughts and emotions which have since dissipated. And apparently, so do a number of others. Thanks.

Reading Russian.

Another day has come to an end. A few events marked the day above the mundane of normal.  

It all began with a trip to the garden nursery which was thankfully closed.  Thankfully I say because in my head I have already bought a property, landscaped it and ready to buy the plants. While the first two are yet to happen, the third is dangerously achievable to an over zealous me with some cash in the back pocket. Somehow the idea of buying plants for a garden I don't have for a property I don't own, makes  my make believe residence more real. So, thankfully closed and real money saved.

After this, back to the shopping mall for some more winter woollies then home again for house cleaning. Oh, the magic and excitement of my life in New Zealand. 

The prize activity of the day however was yet to come. I'm good at reading maps, understanding instructions and even following operation manuals, but put a recipe before me and it is like I am trying to read Russian with the IQ of a fork. I see the words, I grasp their meaning and off I go a-cooking. But it never ends up quite looking like the photo. I study the Russian words again only to find the text appears to have changed. From 'one cup' to 'half a cup' or' boil rapidly' has become 'simmer gently'. Sometimes whole ingredients seem to have disappeared from when I first read the recipe.  Or new ones added. Needless to say the dogs ate well tonight. Goodnight.

Something.......

Do you know that feeling you get when every cell in your body is telling you that something is about to happen, but the one assemblage of cells which should know - the brain- seems oblivious?  When there is something amiss that massages ones disposition to a heightened level of expectation, but the function centre of the body has been kept out of the picture?  I’m going through this at the moment and my poor little cranium has been struggling to get on the enlightened team.  While there are changes afloat both personally and professionally there is nothing that would usually daze me or faze me the way I have been lately.  Something is about to happen.

A free born spirit.

and as i crossed the sea, it occurred to me, that i'd left myself behind

Changing scripts.

What a week it has been!  As with any good drama there have been highs and lows, laughs in between the serious moments and even a few tears.  Just when everything looks set on a particular plane, things would change, revelations made or plans cancelled thus rearranging the script each time.  In the low points it felt as if life was punishing me for past sins, recouping on the positive moments provided and subsequently hinting that contentedness will never again be part of this story.  In the high points it is as if nothing could ever unhinge the perfect world in which I live, and every play I will be part of will only ever have a happy and fulfilling conclusion.  But in between all the scene changes I remind myself of a mantra I often carry with me - get on with it!  Life can change the script in your play, but you control how you preform.  Become a prima dona or a dedicated thespian? A hero or a villain?  A supporting role or a protagonist?  In the light of a new day, these choices are clear and easy to make.  I had better go now, I just got my stage call...........

The word theatre comes from the Greeks.  It means the seeing place.  It is the place people come to see the truth about life and the social situation - Stella Adler